


look around, i need you

by sandpapersnowman



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Canon Related, Canon-Typical Behavior, Comfort, Dissociation, French Kissing, Kissing, M/M, Possessive Behavior, Sloppy Makeouts, Spoilers, comfort kissing, consensually though. ull see
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2021-01-16 05:10:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21265595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandpapersnowman/pseuds/sandpapersnowman
Summary: (SPOILERS FOR 160/SEASON 4 FINALE)"Jon, tell me what you need," Martin says firmly. The old Martin might have pleaded, started with the tears himself, but he's been through too much without Jon in the last year. There's no longer a space for panicking on his own behalf, only the resolute thought that Jonneedshim and Martin can help."Kiss me," Jon sobs. Martin's sudden red cheeks and raised eyebrows say he hadn't expectedthat, but Jon doesn't try to explain anything past the truth. "I need to taste something real."





	look around, i need you

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nivu_vu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nivu_vu/gifts).

> title approximately translated from some of the italian in phoenix's [Telefono](https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/phoenix/telefono.html)
> 
> me and linn were talking about the finale and got on the topic of jon being able to taste elias talking through him and it being terrible and Uhhhh Martin Kissing It Better

Jon looks up, and the sky is looking back.

It's all so overwhelming; he is suddenly aware of everyone, every_thing_, every conscious being crying out for help all at once. The confusion is enough to make him dizzy and bring him to his knees, and he distantly Sees rather than _actually_ notices Martin falling to his knees with him and holding Jon's face in his hands.

"Jon," Martin shakes out, somewhere in the Northern hemisphere. “Jon, hey.”

Jon tries to focus himself. He sees through every pair of eyes in the world, fears with every heart, but he needs to be _here_.

Europe is doable. Then the UK. Scotland is harder, there are so many screams and sobs in London and Birmingham and Liverpool, but he — he can hear Martin somewhere. 

"Keep talking," Jon says, or thinks, or maybe just conveys with the desperate, blank look on his face, he doesn't Know that. 

The part that matters is that Martin understands, somehow.

"Jon, I'm here," he says softly, wrapping his arms around Jon's shoulders to ground him and talk closer. "I'm right here. Can you hear me? We're both here, we're in Scotland, in a cottage, we've — we've been running, remember? But we're somewhere safe here." 

Jon shuts his physical eyes. Martin is getting louder. Scotland. Village. _Cottage_.

The cows in the field between them and the village do not understand why the sky has changed in the middle of the day, or why the clouds don't look like clouds, or why their cud feels suddenly too soft and tastes like metal between their teeth.

"I'm everything," are the first words Jon says once he's back to himself. "I can — God, Martin, I..."

"It's okay," Martin soothes. Tears prick Jon's eyes and fall quickly, but even that feels like blood. "How can I help you, Jon? I'm here."

Jon swallows down a broken noise, happiness and relief as he begins to feel his own body alone again, but his mouth tastes off. It tastes like blood and dust and rot, like _decay_, and Jon realizes with a retch that it's _Jonah_. Jonah, or Elias, or whoever he is, forcing Jon to speak his words and mold his voice to his tone. There's an _aftertaste_ that he's never gotten from a statement before, and his stomach is already turning from it.

"I can taste him," Jon groans. "Elias, Jonah, he — his statement did this, and now my mouth tastes like _death_."

"You did have a rough night," Martin says with absolutely no humor. "Do you want something to drink? Or eat?"

The idea of keeping something down makes Jon's stomach twist again. 

"No."

He... What he wants is to kiss Martin. He might not be able to get the taste out of his own mouth, but he'd settle for replacing it with the taste of Martin's.

Martin must sense the hesitation in the silence between his shaking breaths. He pulls back to look Jon in the eye again. 

"Jon, tell me what you need," Martin says firmly. The old Martin might have pleaded, started with the tears himself, but he's been through too much without Jon in the last year. There's no longer a space for panicking on his own behalf, only the resolute thought that Jon _needs_ him and Martin can help.

"Kiss me," Jon sobs. Martin's sudden red cheeks and raised eyebrows say he hadn't expected _that_, but Jon doesn't try to explain anything past the truth. "I need to taste something real."

It almost feels silly that a _kiss_ could help Jon's current breakdown, but if he thinks it'll help, Martin won't argue.

(There is, he won't admit, something protective and _feral_ that climbs up his throat at the idea of Elias or Jonah kissing Jon. He knows that isn't what happened, it's only supernatural bullshit residue, but replacing the taste of another man in Jon's mouth is kind of appealing.)

(Jon doesn't need to ask, and Martin doesn't need to admit; he Knows the swell of jealousy in Martin's chest as surely as he sees Martin's pupils flare.)

Martin kisses him chastely, for what it is. Jon breathes a sigh of relief through his nose at the initial peck, but it won't get the taste of Jonah out of his mouth. His arms snake around Martin's waist, pull him closer and over him so he can lay Jon out on the soft rug by the fire, and opens his mouth to Martin's like a deafening prayer. Martin licks at his bottom lip, then barely over the tip of Jon's tongue, and the way Jon shakes under him says everything he needs to know.

"Is it helping?" he asks. His voice cracks, because despite the situation he is tooth-achingly _into_ Jon wanting something like this, _needing it_, asking for it like Martin's tongue down his throat is the only thing he's ever needed in his life.

He expects Jon to reply with a whimper, or a shuddering 'yes'. Instead, Martin feels the atmosphere in the room shift as Jon returns to himself, concentrates the power of an Archivist into only this place, this speck on Earth, and growls _yes_.

Martin lurches forward again with the absolute knowledge that Jon _wants_ this right now. Jon tastes like himself, like the coffee Martin made them both in place of tea when the cabinets in the kitchen only turned up powdered caffeine and no sweeteners. He can still taste the honey Jon tried to flavor it with in an attempt at making it palatable. He can't taste anything like a corpse or a bastard, just Jon and his greedy little noises as Martin tongues over his teeth.

"_Yes_," Jon snarls again. "_More_."

It surprises a snicker out of Martin.

"I'm already — that's about as much tongue as I have," he laughs. Teasing Jon feels more normal, and it's easier when Jon looks like he can actually see and feel his surroundings again. "What, should I be gathering spit?"

It's a joke, because that's _gross_, he's not a wild animal. It's a _joke_.

Jon hesitates with his gaze locked on Martin's wet mouth like he's _considering it_.

"_That's_ — you're _gross_," Martin squeaks. "I'm not spitting in your mouth." 

He kisses Jon again before he can argue it, Jon laughing against him. He's still clinging to him like Martin might vanish into thin air, and even if it's gross, well, if Martin drools a little more than he usually allows himself, that's between him, Jon, and the 14 fear gods that are wreaking havoc everywhere else outside this cottage.

They should get off the floor. They should stop now that Jon feels better and can't taste anything except Martin. They should do something productive, something that _isn't_ kissing each other stupid and maybe working their way toward funeral sex.

They also should have done a lot of things a lot differently, but, well...

They've already ended the world. They may as well get one last good thing out of it.

**Author's Note:**

> i am also [sandpapersnowman](https://sandpapersnowman.tumblr.com/) on tumblr and lyric/ille#8582 on discord! hmu!


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